Sometimes I struggle with my faith. It happens slowly. I let in a thought that I don’t even realize and before long I end up in a place and look at myself and wonder what happened to me! How did I get here? It always starts with a thought about something that has happened or something that didn’t happen the way I thought it should. I let in doubt. It happens in such a subtle way.
What God says about himself is truth. It is not debatable, but I question this in some way. When I allow a negative lie about God or myself to get planted in my mind, and I realize that I have done this, just the realization of it does not make everything better. It seems like the aha moment would change it all, but just as slowly as I got tripped up by the negative thought, I also will have to change the thought and be on guard for a while.
It is kind of like withdrawal from anything that I have given myself over to. I will have to be on constant guard to not allow myself to slip back into the lie. I am not surprised by the fight to get back to the ground I had gained previously. Usually when I get past it again I find that I have moved forward even further into a new revelation of God and His goodness.
We learn by persevering through pressure, and even though I don’t like pressure, without it I usually stay as I am. I just need to keep moving forward and keep my mind and heart focused on the one who loves me and died so I could be with Him forever.
I need to repeat the truth to myself about God and His goodness and care for me until the doubt goes. When I forget to do that or I get tripped up, I need to remember that is the lie, and then replace the lie with the truth about God. The lies are always there trying to get me to doubt.
I am the one who needs to do the work of saying, “No” to the lie and replacing it with the truth.
Withdrawal from the lie is not fun, but it will pass if you keep repeating the truth to yourself. If you do this one lie at a time, soon you will find you will get yourself back on solid footing. Maybe you have never been on solid footing and you have always struggled with doubt. If so, and you practice these things regularly, you might find for the first time in your life you will be truly free! The truth is where we find total freedom.